Develop Confidence, level up your relationships with men, & thrive from the inside out in your single and dating years
Courses, community, and coaching for single and dating ladies who want to be the woman God created them to be, experience men in a whole new way, and attract a worthy man.
If you’re really a catch, then why are you still single?
Have your thoughts ever sounded like this? (and don’t worry, your secret’s safe with us!)
“There are no good men left.”
“I hate dating.”
“When is this going to be over?”
“All of my friends are getting married. . . why not me?”
“I’m so tired of people telling me to just ‘get out there.’”
“I must be doing something wrong.”
And, in your heart of hearts, maybe you’ve even had this thought. . .
"God has forgotten about me."
Sound familiar?
The ache runs deep.
Perhaps you feel confused because you’re talented, smart, and all-around lovely. . . but never get asked out on dates.
Maybe you’re feeling this time of singlehood is a complete waste...and you want out of it immediately, like yesterday …
Or maybe you’ve read all the books, listened to allllll the podcasts, worked on your inner wounds in therapy, and feel ready . . .
but you’re still unhappy and frustrated “the One” is, well, nowhere to be found.
Maybe you ARE showing up to dates, but they just don't result in a relationship or, deep down, it’s not actually the relationship you want.
If this sounds like you, we have good news for you, beauty! (Yes, seriously!)
You have more control, impact and responsibility than you know.
You’ve just never been taught what your God-given super powers are and how to use them to get better results in your single and dating life.
Wondering why?
Maybe you too have also received well-intentioned but, honestly, just plain terrible dating advice from people like parents, grandparents, friends etc. Ever been told: “play hard to get” or “guys are just intimidated by your confidence, that’s what’s going on!”? (We have, too.)
Guess what - we are living in a new time completely different from the one our parents and grandparents grew up in.
Our education, formation, beliefs and cultural narratives we have about our identity and roles (both feminine and masculine), dating, relationships and marriage have become confusing.
And those friends you’re asking for advice? They’re in the same boat as you! Sorting through the noise of 21st-century dating culture and having nothing to show for it.
The groundbreaking reality we are here to share with you is that we as women are truly clueless as to HOW we are showing up as women and the way that impacts ourselves, men and our dating lives.
And if you don't have this awareness, you’ll continue to feel frustrated, powerless, and hopeless.
We can promise a beautiful life is waiting for you if you’re willing to change how you’re thinking about yourself and your single years, begin enjoying the dating process anew, and see how appreciating true masculinity is one of the biggest gifts.
How do we know? (And just WHO exactly are we?)
So glad you asked!
Who are we?
Maria Spears Mumaugh
Meghan Elfelt
We are two strategic mindset coaches ready to transform the 21st-century world of dating (and singlehood) by starting with your mindset.
Before we get to that though, we need you to know something.
Between you and us. . .
We know exactly what it’s like to feel like it’s never going to happen for you (meeting someone you actually want to date, or getting married!).
We know the pain of being the one girl at the wedding without a date, and we’ve experienced the frustration of wounds getting in the way of the relationships we want to have.
We also know what it’s like to not want to waste this beautiful time as single women that the Lord has given us to both make a difference in the here and now AND prepare us for marriage - God-willing of course!
These struggles sent us down a journey of questioning, studying the top relationship minds, discovering, and learning that ultimately have completely changed our lives.
Our understanding (and appreciation!) of men, our understanding of ourselves as women, and our interactions with men have been completely transformed.
We’re each hopeful - even excited! - for our futures. We now know how to show up confidently for men as the women God uniquely designed us to be.
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In coaching single women on a daily basis, we’ve become aware of such a hole lacking in the way so many of us view this season of singlehood.
So, that’s why we’re here: to share all we have learned with you and to help pick your jaw up off the floor as you discover the gems we have found.
We firmly believe that when a woman accepts and steps into her talents and gifts, cultivates them, and grows in her passion, she not only lives a more fulfilling life, but she also attracts admiration and appreciation from men.
The Christian understanding of the human person drives our coaching, and you can expect us to bring Christ front and center in the process of growing, healing and becoming.
We are here to fill the gap, to share with you the insights we have learned in our collective 37 years of living this season of singlehood that we wish someone would have shared with us YEARS ago.
What our ladies are saying
It is so helpful to finally understand why dating feels difficult and that I can change my perspective and not feel hopeless about dating.
Terra
I was afraid to be seen. Feeling like I needed to be more whole. And now realizing how far I have come. The beautiful woman I am and that it’s all a beautiful masterpiece in the making.
Courtney
Loved learning about how men's brains work! And also about the "vows" I'd made about dating.
Molly
The line, “If I am such a catch, then why am I still single?,” made me want to be part of this workshop. I truly do believe that I clearly understood why I am still single…I learned so much about myself and the inner work necessary prior to begin dating consciously.
Betsy
It’s changed my view on dating. Allowed me to work on some emotional stuff and begin the journey of healing.
Allison
The workshop was not what I was expecting. It was better. I was a little embarrassed to sign up for something like this but it has unearthed some areas of my heart that needed healing. Meghan was able to use the language that is directly relatable to a single person my age.
Jamie
"I've dated a lot of guys and not found the right one, have felt disappointed again and again. I want to get married and have kids."
You're not alone
From one single gal to another
Since I was a little girl, I vividly remember playing "house" with my many sisters. I would stick my bitty baby doll under my shirt to "breastfeed" and then sing her lullabies. And acting out our wedding days taking turns as the bride was common in the Elfelt house.
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Fast forward to my early 20's, I was so confused why God was not answering my deep-seated desires.
And now I can share with you that there is SO much I wish I knew about my mindset, understanding men, and holding onto hope during these years that would have made those spaces WAY less painful.
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You don't have to journey alone in this space. This workshop has been a saving grace for me, the many women who have seen massive shifts in their lives, the women who are now dating a good man, the women who are engaged, those who just got married, and the many who are showing up with hope in this space! All because they believed their story wasn't over yet.
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Your story isn't over! Can't wait for you to be floored by how you're showing up in the next 6 weeks!!! The best is yet to come!
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With you on the journey,
Meghan Elfelt
The story isn't always what or how you think it's going to be.
But if I've learned anything over the many, many, many years of being single (that finally led to marriage to a beautiful man!) it's that we have a Father of details who loves to take us on adventures involving so much trust and sitting in the tension of hope which is the 'space between'.
It's a dance to be where you are, fully present, alive and joyful, living Love in the moment, while also hoping and praying for the dream and being intentional in walking towards that direction to the extent you can.
My sweet sisters who are in a season of singlehood and/or dating, these courses, community and coaching that The Intentional Single offers is for YOU. Holding onto hope may be one of the hardest things you will ever do, that tension is messy and challenging and it's a place many of us never thought we would be and never wanted to be!
It reminds me of the scene from Lord of the Rings when Frodo says "I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened." To which wise Gandalf replied: "So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us."
If you're in this season, chances are, you are carrying a cross that many people don't understand unless they've lived it. You're carrying an ache that many people disregard, you've experienced well meaning people making insensitive comments, assumptions and judgements and the pain is real. It can feel isolating and confusing with a million thoughts about what are you doing wrong, why has God forgotten you and so many other thoughts and emotions that flood your mind and body.
And Sometimes, you just need a moment to be upset AND to be seen and loved in that space. I'm here to remind you that God hasn't forgotten you. Your dreams and desires matter. You're not alone and you weren't meant to walk this journey alone.
Being newly married, I can say in looking back, that it was dear ones walking alongside, encouraging and supporting me, along with learning amazing skills in the way of emotional processing, mind management, the differences between men and women, hormones and how they impact us and SO MANY OTHER THINGS that was a game changer for that season and made it possible to live it fully and intentionally while also preparing me for the gift of my spouse and marriage!
AND I WANT TO BRING THAT TO YOU!! You are worthy of being journeyed with, loved on and seen in a deep way, you are capable of learning skills that will make this season easier, more fruitful and beautiful, you are invited to join with others who are in a similar place, but don't want to stay there!
THIS IS FOR YOU!
With so much love and compassion from the Father,
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Maria Mumaugh (Spears)
